You may think that I'm heartless
insensitive, indifferent or whatever
but in actual fact,
just like you - I just don't want the same thing to happen to me again.
I say what may sound like the meanest things but sometimes,
I know what's right for others more than they do themselves.
They just never really believe me, till it happens,
but I'll never have the heart to say I Told You So in the end anyway.
Tough love.
Noone knows how much I despise seeing that green uniform
scattered in my neighbourhood every weekend,
and everytime I do see those men lining up in their rows of three
with the sergeants in their black berets taking charge in front,
all I do is just turn away, sometimes cursing under my breath but surely
walking as fast as I can at what seems to be
an unforgiving line of green that is never ending.
Well then.
Maybe, all I'm hoping for is to trust someone fully again,
maybe, just like yourself.
Maybe, all I need is a little more time to get act together.
Maybe, I'm actually more upset than I am excited that you're
being posted to where he once was, but than again,
maybe, I won't blindly hate those men in green anymore, after
I see you in that comes August.
So believe me,
you have absolutely no idea what's going through my mind.
Don't say that I don't think of you, and as corny as this sounds,
you have no idea how many times you cross my mind.
No f&!@^!g idea.
Do remember too, that as much as I try to be/act/think like a boy,
I'm not. Will never be.